Things have been weird lately. Just really full on, in terms of things to do, but also emotionally. Semester 2 at uni has been really really busy, with group projects and assignment after assignment due, usually more than one a week. I suppose it didn't help that I started semester 2 exhausted, needing to take naps most days to make it through the day. I don't really know why, it could have been a side effect of a increased dosage of one medicine or just me not being completely recovered from being worn down last semester.
I eventually adjusted and wasn't so tired all the time, which is awesome, but eventually new stuff came up. My average pain level increased, leaving me really tired after each day because of the effort of functioning like that. Ironically, I also stopped being able to sleep properly. When I do sleep 'enough' the quality of sleep must not be so great because I still feel tired after waking up. I can sleep for 11-12 hours and still be tired. It's ridiculous.
Luckily, not the semester's over, and I survived, so that's good. The exam period hasn't been particularly nice either though. I quite a bad virus the weekend before my first exam. It took me almost a week to recover which means I had to reschedule one major exam and my French oral, as well as get a extension for this one assignment.
I haven't been feeling like studying lately, so I've been studying way less than I should be for exams (but at least I studied a bit), and watching a lot of TV and movies. I managed to finish the current season of House and NCIS I've been watching, and also watching If I Stay and re-watched The Fault in our Stars. I think If I Stay is an amazing movie, I just connect with it completely, possibly due to all the classical music references and the mix of good and bad that's represented in the movie. I suppose I think life's a lot like that? There's good and bad and you just have to cling onto the good and try to cope with the bad.
The annoying thing that's happening lately is that my pinky finger on my left hand started hurting when I bend it, and now my wrists and various other parts of my hands have decided to join in with a reasonably mild pain. I tried playing piano with it and I was too nervous about it to push things too far so couldn't just mindlessly express the emotion in the music like I try to. I really hope that this doesn't become a permanent thing. I don't even know if this is enough to be worried about, but I already have one chronic illness so I guess I've lost that misconception most people have that illness is something that always goes away and that young people are always healthy. It makes life kinda scary, and there isn't anyone that I know of that I can talk to about this. Most people wouldn't understand. Like, I do know people that would be really nice, but that's different from understanding and being able to relate.
So I guess that leaves me doing what I'm currently doing. I want to change neurologists because my current one is an idiot, so hopefully the next one is better and there can be some kind of breakthrough. I'm kinda sick of the current set of circumstances, and could use something going my way for a change.
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